We all do things that may make us unhappy for a time, and constantly doing these things will definitely make us unhappy for much longer than need be. Over time, we get used to sticking to the default and eventually these actions become habits that are difficult to break away from. Sometimes, the people around you also become used to this default version of you that these actions are now expected of you too, and if it's one thing I don't like, it's being put in a box and having expectations put on me.
Today I want to share some things that we
all (me included) need to stop doing. Things that are reflex actions and not carefully thought out, leading to being placed in that box mentioned above. Have a look at the list and see if you do any of these things.
1. Stop procrastinating
I have a whole ton of blog posts about productivity, because if it's one thing that just doesn't sit right with me, it's not being productive! You can have a read through them right here.
2. Stop apologising for everything
This is a habit I had trouble breaking but now that I have, life is just so much... easier. I don't know where that habit came from but if it's one thing I want to say to past me it's this: chill out because not everything is your fault!
3. Stop being the "yes" man
If you want to be a better friend (or a better person in general), stop being the "yes" man! Tell people when they've messed up, and how they can improve. Don't allow people to go through life without letting them know where or how they can improve. Trust me, it sounds daunting at first but if they're someone who deserves to be in your life, they'll thank you for it.
4. Stop comparing
This is something I need to work on, especially being in medical school where for some people, grades are everything. They're important, but not the be all and end all. If you think someone is better than you in some way, don't forget that you're only seeing their highlight reel, and not the full picture.
5. Stop judging
Judgement is an ugly colour, and I hate when people just pass judgements without knowing the full story. Discernment is important to have, but if you find yourself throwing judgements around left, right, and centre, take a look at why that is.
6. Stop allowing people to make decisions for you
Ooohhh, this is a big one, and one that will undoubtedly make anyone feel some kind of way. However,I do feel like in this current social and political climate, people are more upfront and unapologetic about what they want, and that's amazing.
7. Stop spending money on things that don't add joy to your life
Self explanatory. Just stop it.
8. Stop focusing on the negatives
If you were gifted a beautiful piece of art but saw a tiny notch on the frame, would it take away the overall beauty of the painting? Of course not! I apply this analogy to life whenever I catch myself in a string of negative thoughts and I think it really helps.
9. Stop being so hard on yourself
When I think of all I've been through and all I've managed to accomplish, I can't continue being hard on myself anymore because I remember that if I've been through all that I can go through anything (as cheesy as that sounds...) Please give yourself a break. You deserve it.
10. Stop making excuses for people
Sometimes, what people need is to be told where they've gone wrong and where they can improve. If someone's doing something that you know is wrong but you give them a pass, explore why that is and work on fixing it.
11. Stop making excuses for yourself
See as above.
12. Stop holding onto items that have no use in your life
We're in the age of Marie Kondo-ing everything we have, and I for one love it! I'm working on shifting to being more minimal, and it's actually harder than I thought. I came to China with a lot of stuff that I thought I'd need, and decluttering them all will take some time.
13. Stop eating food you know isn't good for you
All my take-away lovers say HEY! I freaking looove food, and sometimes it's easy to just think "whatever, I know I had a burger yesterday, but if I have another one today, my next one will be at the weekend". Just me? Well, those burgers may taste good in the moment, but when your digestion starts suffering as a result, you'll only have yourself to blame.
14. Stop neglecting your sleep schedule
My sleep schedule has been through it all - I've been on top of it, I've been on track for a time, then I've gone around and completely neglected it. As I get older (I'm only 22 but I think about old age more often than I think I should...), I'm learning that sleep is super super important and if I don't want to be a half-functioning zombie, I should try to sleep better. Nancy wrote a great blog post about sleeping better, which you can check out right here.
15. Stop holding grudges
I think of holding a grudge with the analogy that you're allowing someone to live in your mind rent-free! Most of the time, they've moved on from whatever it is that transpired and you're still going through that scenario over and over again. It is absolutely not worth it.
How do you fare when it comes to these things? Anything you need to work on? Tell me below!
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